For an Unsuspecting Populace

explanation without apology

How, exactly, am I the asshole?

Did you ever wish that you could hurt people, over the internet, without much effort? We here at Seven Storm did, and now look at us. We're causing you maximum offense at minimum expense.

Whether it's pissing off users, mangling your data without backing it up, or actually physically hurting people and breaking their things you can trust Seven Storm for all your negative consequences.

If you begin to wonder if you'll ever make a significant contribution to the world, remember that in the vast infiniteness of all that encompasses the universe you are the tiniest dot on the tiniest dot. Your thoughts, feelings and problems are materially insignificant.

  • Oh look, it's already been used.

  • Our advanced Sodium Podium frustration-distribution technology ensures maximum salinity per input watt of electricity.

  • To maximize complaints per dollar, we generally only waste money when it's important. Mostly through installing cranial A/C in bystanders.

  • This one's pretty self-explanatory.

Unsuspecting Populace

I tell you, the shit people say about us.