WORLD ON FIRE
Did you ever wonder what would happen if you took that Ink Spots song about not setting the world on fire and did the opposite? Well, I did.
That’s why I’m here. I both want to set the world on fire AND start a flame in your heart. That’s why I’m using incendiary rounds.
I MAIN YOUR MOM
You seem to have misunderstood the essential nature of our interactions here.
Do I come to your job and slap your dad’s dick out of your mouth? No? Then don’t fucking tell me not to play Bastion, fuckbag.
You’re Not Special
I just got a phone call from 2031. They wanted me to tell you that you’re dead and all your time and effort spent on this planet was a waste.
Also, your genome has been formally defined as nonhuman. Technically, you’re a new form of inedible, complaining zucchini.
THINK OF THE CHILDREN
What the complete idiots who tell me this don’t realize is that I’m always thinking about the children.
That’s why I have the AR-15 with standard-capacity thirty-round magazines and carry a pistol everywhere I go. Yes, even there.
explanation without apology
Did you ever wish that you could hurt people, over the internet, without much effort? We here at Seven Storm did, and now look at us. We're causing you maximum offense at minimum expense.
Whether it's pissing off users, mangling your data without backing it up, or actually physically hurting people and breaking their things you can trust Seven Storm for all your negative consequences.
If you begin to wonder if you'll ever make a significant contribution to the world, remember that in the vast infiniteness of all that encompasses the universe you are the tiniest dot on the tiniest dot. Your thoughts, feelings and problems are materially insignificant.
Oh look, it's already been used.
Our advanced Sodium Podium frustration-distribution technology ensures maximum salinity per input watt of electricity.
To maximize complaints per dollar, we generally only waste money when it's important. Mostly through installing cranial A/C in bystanders.
This one's pretty self-explanatory.
My patience is gone. I’m at the point now where the subtle and calm solution is just calling you a fuckbag.
I don’t particularly give a fuck about how you want to start the alarm. Don’t be a fucking child.
SST LABS E-54
Go play competitive mode if you want to get ranked, chump. Don’t bitch at me because I’m having fun.
Scary, Evil Black Rifle
Just because they don’t star in porn alongside your children doesn’t mean that they’re not important.
I tell you, the shit people say about us.
Last update: Sep 15, 2016 15:27, 3P 1G People Reginald P. Linux – Moderator of Somewhere Awful, LLC. Lives in an evil house. Eugene V. Dubstep – Owns “2000% MORE WUB WUB”, a sound-based weapons emporium. Super Nintendo Chalmers – Leader of the Home Arraignment System. Vote record, 90% Guilty. Sega Genocide – Part of Read more about Eclipse Phase Names List[…]